I started a new job recently. It’s been a really good transition, but also stressful. There is a lot to learn, and a lot of responsibility that I never had before. Definitely looking forward to it. The lack of responsibility in my last job was one of the main reasons to leave it!
The new job has far fewer reminders of Meredith. In fact no one at the new place knows me at all. A fresh start. They also don’t know Meredith. That doesn’t mean I don’t still think about her everyday, but the frequency has lessened. It’s maybe down to a dozen points in the day. Generally when there is down time. Like right now.
My wife and I are working on the things her counselor suggested. We are reading a novel together at night, and I sent her a wordpress blog to read. I think the two of those should help give her some context which is our goal now. To give my wife context, and help her see what this could look like so that she may make an informed decision. Of course they are both based on healthy BDSM lifestyles.
How is it going? Well, actually. This weekend, even though we had family in town, we had some mind blowing sex. Twice. She was very submissive, and she had a great time. The best part though is that we sort of talked about it later. There was more openness about what we both enjoyed it did not. We never talk about sex, but this time we did.
Plus the book we are reading is quite graphic. It gets us both pretty turned on. But it also opens us up to talk about those same explicit concepts together.
Overall I wouldn’t say it’s all better. There are still some major concepts that I can still only ever see happening with Meredith, but it is better. The way I think about it is that we are both trying this on as a new marriage together. Being open about what we want together. If it works then we will get there. If it doesn’t then at least we gave it our all, and she knows what is driving me. We must be more open and communicative.
Oh, another side note. When we get a lot of family around she’s often quite loud and domineering in the conversation and jumps ahead and ruins my stories. It drives me batty! Meredith NEVER did that because she was in my head and knew what I was doing. Anyway, this weekend I snapped a couple words at her from a much more confident dominant perspective, and she realized what she was doing and stopped. She didn’t get mad about it like in times past! We may be getting somewhere. Next step – those outbursts lead to spankings 🙂