This weekend we were at a party and there was a little boy there who looked strikingly like Meredith’s daughter. Yes I know that sounds strange, but the boy had long hair and I have not seen her daughter in a long time so I imagine she has changed a little. The resemblance was so similar I froze up for a bit, and had to look all around to make sure that Meredith and H were not somehow at this party. It wouldn’t have been out of the possibilities either. We share some mutual friends within this group and she used to live about four blocks away.
Thankfully it was not Meredith’s daughter. My heart returned to its normal pace. I have no idea what I would’ve done. Avoidance at all costs. I guess it kind of depends on how H would’ve handled it.
Lately I’ve been thinking about what I would do if my wife and I did split up. More specifically in terms of Meredith. How would I handle that conversation? Or would there ever be one? This is still a somewhat unlikely scenario, but it’s something that keeps popping into my mind.
I’m sure she blocked me via phone or email or social media. A quick text wouldn’t work. But I also wouldn’t want to put expectations on her. I think what I would want would be to let her know in a way that does not put any pressure on her.
Perhaps I could wait by the coffe shop she frequents and “run into her” one day. Maybe with a hat and sunglasses on. Just a quick “Meredith do you have a minute?” I’m sure the question, and the voice would stop her in her tracks.
I’m fairly certain she would give me the time of day. But when she recovered would she stick around for me to say anything or simply walk away? Assuming she stays I would tell her: “Sorry to bother you. I know we promised not to contact each other anymore. However I have news you may want to hear. You don’t need to say anything or even talk to me ever again, but I want you to know that I’m separated from my wife. I promised I would tell you when things changed.”
At this point her head would be going a million miles an hour and in many directions. Possibly even anger at me. I would not want there to be a long drawn out conversation or catching up or anything like that. Simply to give her the news and be gone. With that said I would stand up and say “That’s all. I’ll leave you be now. I’m no longer blocking you on any accounts. Have a good day Meredith.” Then smile and walk away.
I would then wait. If she ever contacts me that would be wonderful. If she does not then I guess it would be time for me to move on. I expect she would contact me once she processes things. Because she would have questions. I didn’t answer as to whether I wanted her in my life again or what I was going to do. When she does reach out then we would have time to consider things. Also to hear how she is doing. If things are working out for her then I need to move on myself.